IMPACT Wrestling Throwback Throwdown II
December 18th, 2021
Davis Arena – Louisville, KY
Commentary: Giuseppe Scovelli, Jr. (Josh Mathews) & Gord Leroux (Matt Striker)
Countdown to Throwback Throwdown II Pre-Show
Duke Winchester (Sam Beale) def. “The Mysterious” Mr. E (Jackson Stone) by pinfall
Winter War ‘84
We start the show with a promo from Sex Ferguson (Doc Gallows) cutting a promo on Muscles McGhee (Brian Cage) and Downtown Daddy Brown (Willie Mack) about them not loving America. Ferguson goes on to say how he pinned Brown for the International Commonwealth Title, this show being sponsored by Pabst Blue Ribbon, and how tonight, at Winter War ’84, he’ll be doing the same to McGhee.
We cut to Dexter Petticoat (Crazzy Steve) who’s standing outside the arena and says tonight’s main event is in controversy as Muscles McGhee will not be able to compete because he has been detained at the American border and there is no word yet on who his replacement will be. Sex Ferguson drives in and says he will make his statement in the ring and gives Petticoat some advice before flipping him off.
Sex Ferguson makes his way to the ring and says your IPWF International Commonwealth Champion is here, and he never thought he had to come to the armpit of America in Kentucky. He says he has the night off tonight as his opponent Muscles McGhee has been detained at the Canadian border trying to cross over in Buffalo, and he knows a thing about working on top in New York. He continues talking about how everyone is ducking him, but Giuseppe Scovelli, Sr. (Scott D’Amore), the owner of IPWF, comes out. Scovelli says that Ferguson isn’t going anywhere, before plugging Pabst Blue Ribbon cheaply. They argue about why McGhee really got stopped at the border, as Scovelli accuses Ferguson of sabotaging all his opponents. Scovelli makes a new main event with Ferguson in a North Pole Street Fight versus Santa Claus. We see Santa Claus (Willie Mack) come out with a suit and a mask and take out Ferguson.
Chad 2 Badd vs. Bill Ding
Chad 2 Badd is Karl Anderson in his Talk’n Shop gimmick, while Bill Ding is Trey Miguel as a construction worker, with tools and all. The crowd chants ‘Bob the Builder’, as commentary says they are making things up as that show didn’t exist in the ‘80s. 2 Badd takes Ding down with a couple clotheslines and sits on his arm for a two count. Commentary brings this up being their American debut, and they are trying to fight ‘Junior and his expansion’. Ding dodges 2 Badd and tries to roll him up for the pin with his foot on the ropes, but the referee stops him. Striker goes in and out of an Irish accent and mentions how he’s drinking all the sponsored beer. 2 Badd hits double knuckles down low and a back body drop for a two. Ding attempts to pin with leverage yet again, before hitting a clothesline for a two. 2 Badd comes back with an Atomic Drop and a running splash for the pin.
Winner: Chad 2 Badd by pinfall at 6:37
We see a music video from the Rhythmic Warriors with “Keep on Walkin’” on Scovelli Records, which entails Johnny Swinger & Mikey Singer trying to impress a Swingerella.
Sunday Morning Express (Editor-in-Chief & Ace Reporter) vs. Rhythmic Warriors (Johnny Swinger & Mikey Singer)
Not sure who Ace Reporter is, but the Editor-in-Chief is Chris Sabin who cuts a promo on the Rhythmic Warriors saying they partied all night long while the Sunday Morning Express always gets the scoop. The Express starts attacking before the bell rings, as the 72-year-old ‘Action’ Mike Jackson as Mikey Singer dives onto the Express on the outside. Ace and Singer go at it, as Singer’s wig comes off. Singer goes on the top rope and walks the ropes to Ace, then does it again to both Ace and Editor. Singer makes the hot tag to Swinger, who hits atomic drops, before tagging Singer back in for another hot tag, hitting the Tower of London, before Swinger and Singer do a double roll-up for the pin.
Winners: Rhythmic Warriors (Johnny Swinger & Mikey Singer) by pinfall at 6:13
Dexter Petticoat is backstage with Santa Claus and asks if they have met before. Claus says they did when Petticoat was a little kid and he sat on his lap. Santa says Downtown Daddy Brown might not be available to fight for the title, but he is and tonight he’s going to eat some cookies and shove some coal down Sex Ferguson’s throat. Santa ends it by telling Mrs. Claus to be ready, because Daddy is coming home with the goods, as Petticoat questions if he just said ‘daddy’.
Rip Rayzer (w/ Rusty Iron) vs. Frank the Butcher
Rayzer is Ace Austin with Rusty Iron as Gia Miller with ‘80’s rocker looks, as Rhino reprises his Frank the Butcher character, as Striker throws in a dozen or so meat puns. Rayzer starts attacking Frank in the corner, as Rusty hands him a cigarette. They take it to the outside, where Rayzer puts Rusty in front of him as a distraction. Rayzer starts attacking Frank’s arm against the ring post, before taking him back inside. Rayzer tries to use spikes, as Rusty is distracting the referee, but as Frank takes them away, the referee catches him and takes it from him, causing Rayzer to hit Frank with a low blow. Rayzer keeps Frank down while smoking his cigarette, but Frank comes back with chops and a big clothesline for the pin.
Winner: Frank the Butcher by pinfall at 5:05
After the match, Rusty Iron tries to attack Frank, but Rayzer comes from behind with a blade and looks like he ‘slit the throat’ of Frank, as referees quickly come out and take Frank away while covering his throat with towels.
Dexter Petticoat is a bit speechless about what just happened before introducing former Rough Riders member, Georgia Cobb (Jordynne Grace). Cobb talks about the demise of the Rough Riders before Ladybird Johnston (Havok) wanted to shut down the Tunnel of Love. Cobb can’t respect how Ladybird went about it by taking out Mildred Moore (Alexia Nicole) with a tire iron and shoving Blanche Ardmore (Tessa Blanchard) off a scaffold. As Cobb is making her way to the ring, she gets attacked from behind by Ladybird.
Georgia Cobb vs. Ladybird Johnston
They brawl a bit on the outside before the bell rings. Cobb tries to take Johnston down with a sleeper hold but gets tossed down quickly. Johnston keeps her in the corner with kicks and chokes. They fight on the apron, as Cobb tries to pick up Johnston but gets taken down with a Gord Buster and put in a Camel Clutch. Johnston keeps hitting knees on Cobb, before going for the pin and getting only one. Johnston picks Cobb up, but she escapes and hits a bunch of clotheslines and punches, before finally taking Johnston down and driving her head down on the mat repeatedly. Johnston goes to the outside and grabs a tire iron, but the referee takes it away. Cobb comes back with a Dragon Screw roll for the pin and the win.
Winner: Georgia Cobb by pinfall at 6:16
Dexter Petticoat goes backstage to get an update on Frank the Butcher, who is being treated by Dr. Al Snow who says Frank’s throat is lacerated and he needs a tracheostomy. Snow says he doesn’t have time to bring him to the hospital, as he needs to do it now. He asks for his equipment but gets attacked from behind by Quincy Cosmos, who also steals the necklace around Giuseppe Scovelli, Sr. As Petticoat tells Orderly Ross he needs to do the tracheostomy now. Cosmos comes out to the ring and mentions how he stole Scovelli Sr.’s necklace which prompts Josh Mathews as Scovelli Jr. to come in the ring and make a match.
Quincy Cosmos vs. Giuseppe Scovelli, Jr.
Cosmos is Rohit Raju in a very futuristic gimmick with a British accent. Cosmos attacks Scovelli as he’s trying to take off his commentator attire and Striker asks if Mathews is even ‘tough enough’. Scovelli comes back with a leapfrog and atomic drop, before hitting a hurricanrana as the crowd ironically chants ‘you still got it’. Cosmos stops him a couple of times, hitting a fist drop for a two count. Cosmos hits a suplex then holds Scovelli down with a chin lock. Scovelli comes back with a dropkick and a springboard kick for a two-count. Cosmos pulls the referee, causing Scovelli to splash him. A lady gets on the apron to try and help Cosmos, but Scovelli Sr. pulls her away. Jr. comes back with a springboard elbow and a Codebreaker as Sr. comes in to make the pin.
Winner: Giuseppe Scovelli, Jr. by pinfall at 4:34
Jr. hands the necklace to his dad, but Sr. puts it around his son’s neck instead as they call this a ‘passing of the torch’ moment.
Rip Rayzer and Rusty Iron are trying to leave the arena, but Ima Belle (Deonna Purrazzo) stops them and says Rusty’s mama should be ashamed of her. Rayzer tries to get in between, but Duke Winchester (Sam Beale) stops them and says they should let the ladies solve their own issues. Belle asks Winchester to stay for the match, but Winchester says he has to leave only for him to drive off as we hear a car accident sound.
Moose comes out as DJ 2Large, in a Run-DMC-like gimmick to come out to perform for the crowd. He gets the whole crowd to chant ‘Go, DJ, Go, DJ, Go’ but Colonel E. Corn (John E. Bravo) comes out and stops him and says ‘rap’ is something you do to a Christmas present and says, ‘rap is crap’, before introducing the newest sensation to IPWF; Pelvis Wesley (Heath) in his Elvis gimmick. 2Large tells Wesley to freestyle for the people, but Wesley starts singing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer instead. As Moose starts surveying the crowd on who should perform, Wesley attacks him from behind. As Corn distracts 2Large, Wesley hits him over the back with his guitar.
Dexter Petticoat goes to Orderly Ross and Frank the Butcher and tells them they need medical assistance immediately because of Duke Winchester’s car accident. Ross says he’s busy doing the tracheostomy and will be there, after.
4-Corners Bullrope Match: Badlands Bart vs. “Hard” Harry Hall
Badlands Bart is Larry D from ‘the dystopian wasteland of 2003’ while “Hard” Harry Hall is Jake Something, as the commentary says his Triple H nickname won’t stick. It’s explained that Bullrope is the same one that was used to crush Hall’s partner Oates’ sternum. They take turns trying to touch the turnbuckles, as Hall takes down Bart. Bart uses the Bullrope to lift Hall from up and under. They trade shots back and forth, until Bart stops Hall with a spine buster, followed by an elbow drop. Bart touches three corners but gets pulled in and clotheslined before the fourth. Hall hits a Black Hole Slam, but Bart ends up on the outside and pulls Hall with him. Bart comes in and knocks Hall out with the cowbell before choking him with the rope. Bart starts touching all the corners while Hall is doing the same. Right at the end, Hall backflips over Bart to hit the final turnbuckle for the win.
Winner: “Hard” Harry Hall at 7:52
Dexter Petticoat is backstage and says next month IPWF will be returning to Hamilton, Ontario, Canada but is yet to be known if hometown hero Downtown Daddy Brown will be in attendance or not. He does announce that all-star fullback Emile Grange of the Hamilton Tiger-Cats will be there tho. Sonny Sanders (Sami Callihan) interrupts and warns Grange to be careful and it would be a shame if something happened to him. Sebastian Baker (Jimmy Jacobs) comes in and says Grange needs something to take him to the top, as he and Sanders argue about who will gain the rights.
Ima Belle vs. Rusty Iron (w/ Rip Rayzer)
Belle is Deonna Purrazzo in a Southern lady gimmick, while Rusty is Gia Miller. Belle starts the match right away keeping Rusty in the corners and hitting a running cross-body for a two. Rusty keeps Belle down with a rear chin lock, but Belle can escape before Rayzer trips her up on the ropes. Rusty takes advantage and applies a Camel Clutch, but Belle breaks out, before missing a running splash. They run the ropes and knock each other down. Belle takes control and finishes Rusty off with a handspring into a splash for the pin.
Winner: Ima Belle by pinfall at 5:38
Rip Rayzer gets in the ring, and they surround Belle, but Frank the Butcher, all healed up, runs in for the save.
Dexter Petticoat gets a word with Tim Burr (Josh Alexander) and asks if he could be the first man to knock Eric “The Red” Wood off of his feet. Burr says there is no man or tree he can’t chop down, as he names Big John Studd, Kongo Kong, Percy Pinetree, and Andre the Giant. Burr gives a warning, and starts saying ‘the bigger they are’, but Dexter finishes it with ‘the harder it is to buy that comfortable pair of socks’.
Tim Burr vs. Eric “The Red” Wood
Tim Burr is Josh Alexander in a lumberjack gimmick, while W. Morrissey portrays Eric “The Red” Wood. Wood walks around doing the Bushwhacker strut, as Burr tries to knock him off his feet. Wood comes back knocking Burr outside with a clothesline. As Burr goes back inside, Wood stays in control, with Burr failing to try and pick Wood up. Burr hits a chop block, tries to body slam Wood, but Wood gets out. Burr hits a couple of ax handles before hitting a big one off the top rope, running to Wood just to get trapped in a bear hug. Burr grabs Wood’s leg and starts ‘chopping’ it like a tree, takes off his flannel, body slams Wood, hits a leg drop for the pin.
Winner: Tim Burr by pinfall at 5:23
Dexter Petticoat is backstage with Orderly Ross and says it’s safe to say the tracheostomy on Frank the Butcher was a success and wonders if he was able to save Duke Winchester. Ross says, ‘oh crap’ and asks if Dr. Snow is feeling ok. Snow finds a Styrofoam head, as David Marquez walks in and asks, ‘what does everybody want?’ as he’s taking orders and Snow says that was disappointing.
As Jazzy Fitbody enters the ring, the $237,000 Man (RD Reynolds) comes out. He says he’s here to talk about fortunes, as he’s a man who’s been met with misfortunes as he used to be the $300,000 Man and the $284,000 Man, but today he stands before you as the $237,000 Man. As he continues, Jazzy is doing sit-ups and says he just made a brand new investment and introduces his new client, Wanda the Werewoman.
Jazzy Fitbody vs. Wanda the Werewoman (w/ The $237,000 Man)
Fitbody is Madison Rayne in an ‘80’s jazzercise aerobics gimmick while Wanda is Savannah Evans looking like Michael Jackson in the Thriller video. Fitbody tries to get Wanda to jazzercise, but then starts doing the Thriller dance. Wanda teases doing it also, before attacking Jazzy. Wanda hits an airplane spin with a drop for a two count. Wanda hits a couple splashes in the corner but misses the third. Wanda puts on the claw, as Jazzy tries to get the crowd behind her as she breaks out. Jazzy hits a bulldog goes to the second rope but gets stopped by The $237,000 Man as the referee is distracted. Wanda catches Jazzy and starts biting her as the referee calls the match off.
Winner: Jazzy Fitbody by disqualification at 4:45
Dexter Petticoat says he hasn’t seen biting like that from a woman since he left his ex-wife for her sister. He brings out G.I. Broski (Matt Cardona) and Brian Bone-Crunchin (Brian Myers) from S.T.O.M.P. in Paradise, who come out in fatigues and with Super Soakers. Broski says The Russians made the biggest mistake of their life and tried to ruin the Summer Olympics in Los Angeles. And just like the Space Race, they are getting a whipping. They are so fired up that they start doing the pledge of allegiance.
S.T.O.M.P. in Paradise (G.I. Broski & Brian Bone-Crunchin) vs. The Russians (Stalingrad Strangler & Sergey the Siberian)
Stalingrad is Tony Gunn while Sergey is Madman Fulton. Broski and Stalingrad start the match, as Broski hits a quick body slam and flexes to the crowd, as S.T.O.M.P. trades quick tags back and forth. Sergey comes in as Brian fails to take him down. Brian finally does but gets cornered in the Russian corner double-teaming on Brian. Brian can outsmart The Russians and have Sergey work on Stalingrad’s arm as he isn’t looking. They fight on the outside for a bit before Brian misses a cross body inside. Broski comes in and attacks Stalingrad in the corner with stomps followed by a Broski Boot for a two count. The Russians take control now, choking Broski in the ropes. Broski tries the hot tag, but Brian gets tripped off the apron before The Russians hit a double-side Russian leg sweep for a two. Broski dodges Sergey and makes the hot tag. Brian hits a spine buster but gets a two. Broski comes in with the Super Soaker and takes out Sergey, as S.T.O.M.P. hit a Fireman’s Carry/Blockbuster-like combo for the win.
Winners: S.T.O.M.P. in Paradise (G.I. Broski & Brian Bone-Crunchin) by pinfall at 10:03
S.TO.M.P. in Paradise celebrate by grabbing a couple of cases of Pabst Blue Ribbon and drinking them all in the ring as the crowd chants ‘PBR’. Giuseppe Scovelli, Jr. mentions next week we will see Pummel and Plunder vs. Jim Nasium and a partner of his choosing for the IPWF World Tag Team Championship.
IPWF International Commonwealth Television Championship North Pole Street Fight: Sex Ferguson (c) vs. Santa Claus
They show highlights of when Downtown Daddy Brown defeated Julian Cumberbun (Ethan Page) for the title at the first Throwback Throwdown, followed by an empty arena show where Sex Ferguson took it from Brown. Sex Ferguson (Doc Gallows) comes out with a trash can full of weapons and says Christmas should be canceled. Santa Claus comes out with the full get-up, but a white luchador mask covers his face. Commentary mentions that because of what happened during the last match, Downtown Daddy Brown couldn’t challenge for this title anymore. Ferguson takes Santa to the outside, but Santa takes a crutch and starts attacking Ferguson. Fergusons goes to the commentary table and takes a PBR to drink before Santa uses a broom on Ferguson. Santa grabs a unicorn mask and puts it on Ferguson, before pretending he’s riding Fergusons as a horse inside. Ferguson tries to escape, but upon entry back inside, kicks the rope under Santa. Santa tries to come back with a low blow, but Ferguson is revealed to be wearing a cup which he uses to attack Santa. Ferguson starts choking Santa with his wrist rope and sends a steel chair inside the ring, wedges it in the corner, and tosses Santa into it for a two count. Ferguson takes off his boot and goes to hit Santa with it, but Santa grabs the other boot as they knock each other out with them. Santa comes back with a cross body, but Ferguson stops him with a low blow, grabbing a big case of PBR which he can’t hit Santa with, instead he takes a couple of sips of it. Santa kicks him in the balls and hits a stunner followed by a running senton for the pin and the win.
Winner: Santa Claus by pinfall at 10:06 to become NEW IPWF International Commonwealth Television Champion
Santa takes off his mask to reveal he is Downtown Daddy Brown (Willie Mack) as the rest of the roster from tonight comes into the ring to celebrate and drink Pabst Blue Ribbon while dousing Ferguson with it as well. Brown goes around the ring with the Santa bag and passes presents to the crowd.
