Akitoshi Saito contemplated either retiring or taking his own life after Mitsuharu Misawa incident

Photo Courtesy: Pro Wrestling NOAH

A look into the mind of Akitoshi Saito.

It was on June 13th, 2009 that Mitsuhara Misawa had his last match. He teamed with Go Shiozaki to challenge Bison Smith and Akitoshi Saito for the GHC Tag Team Championships. The match was thrown out after Saito delivered a back suplex to Misawa and Misawa did not get up. 

He was taken to a hospital and later that night, Misawa passed away. As Saito nears his retirement match, he sat down with Pro Wrestling NOAH’s official website for an extensive interview and opened up about the incident with the NOAH founder. 

Saito was questioned by police officers, but was allowed to be in Misawa’s hospital room because he did not commit a crime. He shared that he contemplated either retiring or taking his own life. Saito opened up about his mindset when it came to deciding to wrestle the next day and facing the proverbial music.

Yes, there was (questioning by police after the Mitsuharu Misawa incident). I think it was because there was no crime involved, but the doctor told me that I could stay in Misawa-san’s room… There was a part of me that didn’t believe it, and I wanted him to come back… But his wife was coming, and there was a match the next day, so I was told to come back. It was morning, so there were newspapers lined up. I saw a big article about Mr. Misawa in the newspaper. I thought to myself, this is a fact, this happened in real life. Doing this to someone you hate or can’t forgive… it’s wrong, but I can still understand it. But when it happens to someone you respect and want to work for, you can’t just sit there and do nothing, and as I was walking to the hotel, I wondered whether I should take responsibility (by) taking my own life, or retiring. There was a match (that day). My name was also mentioned. So, what should I do? I have to decide now… But, although these two seem like taking responsibility for yourself, I wonder what happens to those who are left behind… the fans for example, or your relatives, when there is no one left to whom you can express your feelings. When I wanted to vent my feelings to them, but couldn’t reach them, I vowed, ‘No, this isn’t right. I won’t run away, I won’t hide, I won’t plead my legitimacy. I’ll take it all in,’ and that’s when I made my vow… Let’s get in the ring today. Let’s go out in front of everyone as Akitoshi Saito, within arm’s reach. No matter if I get stabbed there or whatever, I’ll have no regrets.

Elsewhere in the conversation, he spoke about the technical aspect of delivering the back suplex he did that day. The question asked of Saito had to do with the Misawa incident possibly being a cervical issue.

Saito stated that it felt like a normal motion until a certain point. Regardless of the mechanics, Saito said he did the move and the final result turned out how it did.

I remember it very clearly when I did the back drop (on Mitsuharu Misawa). It was normal until I lifted up to my shoulder, but after that, it became very heavy. I don’t know if it was physical or emotional. Usually, it takes the most strength to raise it from the initial stage, but not so much when it goes up to the shoulder, but then the weight was added and it became like that. But whatever the case may be, the reality is that I threw it and it turned out that way. It has nothing to do with medical matters, and regardless of the truth, it’s the reality and I’m not making any excuses. There are pros and cons to that throw, and a famous athlete said, ‘If you do something like that, that’s what’s going to happen.’ But there’s another part to it — well, I won’t say that.

There was online backlash towards Saito and he dove into how he navigated people calling him a ‘murderer.’ Saito feels he cannot judge those who said something because it’s human feelings.

At the beginning, there were people who came because they really had feelings for (Mitsuharu) Misawa, but there were also people who did not (say anything to me). But I cannot judge the line between the two, because it is a human feelings. Since I decided to ‘accept’ this, I accept anything that comes to me. I reply to anything that is addressed to me. I responded last year as well… Without an actual cause… something, it wouldn’t have happened. So I often say to myself, ‘Reality and truth.’

Months after the passing of Misawa, Saito received a letter that Misawa wrote. Here’s what Saito said about the letter: 

I always put it (the letter Mitsuharu Misawa wrote before his death) in my bag for matches. When I looked at it, I found that it described the current situation…

It was also written that, ‘Sometimes things happen in the ring, despite your wishes,’ and, ‘It’s fate’ and, ‘These things happen…’ But I had questions in various places, and it was difficult for me to find the answer.

Saito’s final match is scheduled for November 17th. He’s been wrestling for 33 years.

About Andrew Thompson 9729 Articles
A Washington D.C. native and graduate of Norfolk State University, Andrew Thompson has been covering wrestling since 2017.